Friday Jokes

When u feel lonely and alone & cannot see any one around you, the world seems to be fading away, come along with me I'll take u to an eye specialist

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If marriages are made in heaven , then what are made in Hell?

Ans : the days after marriage

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During Marriage ceremony why is the groom made to sit on the horse ?

He is given his last chance to run away.

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Just close ur eyes and think of urself for 10 seconds......Open ur eyes !

Now you will realize that u have wasted 10 sec in thinking of a fool............

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I wrote ur name on the sands.............it got washed away,

I wrote ur name in air..........................it got blown away,

So I wrote ur name in my heart.............I got a HEART ATTACK

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LOVE is like a CIGAR

It starts with a fire..... continues with smoke.....and ends in ashes...

But dont worry - we are chain smokers

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ur smile can be compared to a flower

ur voice can be compared to a cuckoo

ur inocence to a child

but in stupidity

u have no comparison

u r the best

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True love is like a pillow

u can cry on when u r in pain & u can embrace when u r happy

so when u need true love spend Rs.50/-Buy a pillow

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Dear Friend,

when I asked u for a flower, u gave me bouquet

when I asked u a stone, u gave me a statue

when I asked u a feather, u gave me peacock

ARE U REALLY DEAF ?

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I had VODKA with WATER

I felt DRUNK

I had WHISKY with WATER

I felt DRUNK

I had RUM with WATER

I felt DRUNK

I SWEAR I'LL NEVER DRINK water....!!!

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when I call u;

1 ring means i'm thinking of u;

2 ring means i like u;

3 means i miss u;

4 means .........pick d phone idiot

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Teacher : Four beautiful ladies r walking on the road. change it to exclamatory sentence ...

Student : WOW !

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The human brain is most outstanding thing.......

it functions 24hrs 365 days.....

it functions right from the time u r Born....until you fall in love

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A cigarette shortens your life by 2 min..

A beer shortens your life by 4 min..

A working day shortens your life by 8 hours!!!!..

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History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ?

Student : sir, I am not sure but think from page 15 to 26 sir....

Teacher : U failure ! At your age Bill gates stood first in the class

Student : Mind u, Sir, but at your age hitler commited suicide